Half-way

So this week will mark 6 months since leaving New Zealand. I never actually thought I would make it this far without being kicked out of Mayapur - Krsna can even make it look like it was MY idea to leave! It seems my stay here has gone without a hitch too - though I shouldn't get ahead of myself. I've been taken care of and looked after well and different months have brought different experiences and situations.


In the first six months in India, notable achievements - spiritual and not - include:

* Helping with the veshas of Lord Jagannath during chandan yatra.

* Moving house - and back again.

* Started work for the construction of the biggest temple in India. In that, learnt about Photoshop.

* Combining two of my worlds by entertaining a non-devotee friend from New Zealand, showing her all aspects of devotional life in Mayapur and all about Krsna and Srila Prabhupada.

* Chasing a runaway train in Kolkata (and catching it).

* Chanting japa regularly.

* Swimming in the Ganga during rainy season.

* Understanding what it means to worship a deity form of Krsna - or in my case, Sri Anapayini.

* Eating at Govindas restaurant in Kolkata.

* Taking sweet-rice to Lord Jagannath, Baladeva and Subhadra in Rajapur evey dvadasi and getting to take Their beautiful darshan.

* Making new friends and discovering new (creepy Indian) admirers/stalkers.

* Shopping for hours at Newmarket and ending the evening with street food (and NOT getting sick after).

* Discovering a whole world of new festivals I didn't even know existed.

* Started learning Kathak dance.

* Understanding more my relationship with Krsna and what it means to really be a Servant of Sri Radha.


The last 6 months have begun and I am already sad, knowing that soon I won't have the right to call Mayapur home.

The Thakura's Prophecy

From the great talents of Uncle Prani (who has known me since I was 3), Shrisha (who works in the offices with me) and Prani's helicopter camera ... comes this wonderful video of Bhaktivinode Thakur's prediction of a great temple rising in Mayapur Dham. Watch it, it it AMAZING. Well worth the download waiting time.

The Thakura's Prophecy from Paul Tuffery. The Video Guys on Vimeo.

I've never felt so honoured to be part of building this temple than before now. Thank you Krsna, for letting an insignificant spider like myself help in whatever way I can.

Vamsi

Am I the only one who thinks the sound of the flute is just incredible? Not the flute with tabla or sitar or anything else, just the flute. I could listen to it all day...

Do I think this because I have grown up knowing that the sweet sounds of Krsna's flute are enough to make the animals and birds stop to listen, the gopis stop their cooking? Or is it just because I simply like the sound of the flute?

A flute is just a piece of decorated bamboo if not held by the soft lotus hand of that sweet blue boy... ...

Where is home?

So far I haven't really thought of Mayapur as home. Maybe its because I haven't had an apartment of my own - moving one place to the other, or maybe its because this trip has an expiry date and I know when I'm going back. Maybe its because everything is different and not what I'm used to - the weather, the food, the people... Maybe its just because I don't feel at home. Is that offensive to say? I feel like there are devotees all around the world that would love to call Mayapur home, and therefore am I completely out of line by saying I, myself, don't feel at home? Do I really long for the cold NZ winters and the expensive and chaotic way of life?

At the same time however, I don't really think of Christchurch as home now either (don't kill me fellow Cantabrians!) mostly becasue of all the changes going on there too. This morning I was sent a before and after shot of the inner city outdoor mall - Cashel Mall, and the difference between the two photos is incredible... its almost like the "after" shot could be a "before the buildings were built" shot. There's nothing left. What kind of city will I be going back to and do I really want to go back there? The photos made me a little sad, and thats when I wondered to myself: Where is home for me?

Standing out on my parents balcony tonight I thought about this. For as long as I know, I've been a New Zealander, born and bred Cantabrian, down under, no, not Australia, the little island next to it, I'm a kiwi. But does that mean I'm supposed to stay there forever and always call that home? I'm enjoying myself too much here to want to go back home. This is home now, this is where my heart and my life is. How I long for it to be that way forever.

I'm almost halfway through my "1 year in India", and already the next six months are making me feel claustrophobic. I'm already missing the bus ride to the Jagannath Mandir, Indians staring in my direction, chattering around me (and about me), the boat ride to Navadwipa in the early hours of the morning, the sun peeking over the hills promising a scorcher of a day. I'm already missing Goswami ghat and swimming with the buffaloes, wandering down to Nimai's shop for a half a kg of paneer or a dozen lemons. The quiet walk to the hati park and to visit my brother on a Sunday, the busy offices of the ToVP and the morning knock on the door of Uttam the dudh-wallah. I don't want to say goodbye.

Mayapur

Always time to think
Always time to pray
Such a slow pace life
Oh why can't I stay

Cooling days
Sweet gentle rain
Familiar faces return
Feels like home again

21 Offerings

I think the next time I make such a ambiguous attempt at something like this, I shall think again. I'll still do it... I'll just make sure I'm properly prepared next time and have plenty of time up my sleeve.

Thing is, I thought I WAS really well prepared - all the ingredients sorted, spices, vegetables, extra milk and paneer from the dudh-wallah. I'd made a list three days earlier of what exactly I was going to cook, and everything I needed to cook it all - except somewhere in the chaos that was Ishaan's birthday party and moving from one apartment to the other, I'd lost the list. And I started late as it was - had to wait for the maid to finish washing all the dishes and clean the kitchen before I could start.

 I scribbled down a new list - everything off the top of my head that I knew I could make, and then began filling the gaps. By the time I started, there were still 4-5 numbers that hadn't been filled. Oh well, I could decide what to fill them with later. I began with simple preps first - cabbage subji, scrambled paneer, nimbu pani. Soon, I had 4 clay pots full and thought I was doing pretty well. Crossing the dishes off my list was satisfying. "This is easy" I thought " I might even be finished early!"

 Then all of a sudden it was 1.45pm and not even half of the 21 pots had been filled. Where had all the time gone? I still had pakoras, two subjis, halavah and the 4-5 blanks in my list that needed filling! I started to panic. The kitchen got messier as I worked quickly, and the room seemed to get hotter by the second. I sent a quick text round to everyone who was coming to have prasad "Running late. Not ready till 2.30pm. Sorry." I kept working, head down and my hands going at double speed. Now I wasn't meditating on Radharani, I was meditating of being fast. Must. Get, This. Finished. NOW! Sadhana and Revati arrived and chatted in the lounge, oblivious to my panic in the kitchen.

 Mandakini arrived with the chapatis (phew, number 12 crossed off my list!) but I still had two more offerings to make up the 21. A quick scan in the fridge and I decided to offer the orange juice that was in there, and some cookies. Cheating I know.

 Finally at 3pm, 1 hour after the original agreed time, I put tulasi on all dishes and sat down with the bell to offer them all to Anapayini Radha. The kitchen looked like a tornado had hit it, I had run out of paneer, milk, vegetables and even some spices. I was 1 hour late. I was hot and sticky and had sweat all over my face. But nothing could beat the satisfying calmness that I felt right then.


Actually I lie... serving Sadhana, Mandakini, Revati and Ishaan everything, and watch their plates slowly empty... nothing could beat THAT feeling.

 All glories to Srimati Radharani, the best cook!

 

Full list of preparations

1. Basmati Rice

2. Yellow split mung dal

3. Cabbage subji

4. Scrambled Paneer

5. Baked Pumpkin 

6. Paneer, tomato & capsicum subji with coconut milk

7. Fried eggplant with lemon and rosemary

8. Paneer "steaks" in tomato sauce

9. Fried tomatoes with basil

10. Gauranga Potatoes

11. Hot buttered chapatis (made by Mandakini)

12. Paneer pakoras

13. Spicy tomato chutney

14. Cucumber & carrot raita

15. Nimbu Pani

16. Orange juice

17. Cucumber, tomato & carrot salad with lemon juice dressing

18. Sweet Rice

19. Halava

20. Custard

21. Cookies